Fear of Clowns

"Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable."
- H. L. Mencken

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Souped up Campbell's tomato soup, newly discovered verses in Mark 


Months later, when the Eleven were gathered again, Jesus just kinda appeared and everybody halfway stopped what they were doing and stared a bit, for they had largely grown accustomed to their Lord nonchalantly popping in and out of this dimension at unexpected times. "Hey guys. One more thing: Peter, you need to start wearing a funny hat. I decided I might not return to judge the righteous and wicked within your lifetimes and it's probably a good idea to keep the lines of communication open. When Peter is no longer with you, find a replacement and dress him up even funnier than Peter so the Father will know who you want to be His earthly mouth and face."

The disciple who was always being a pain in the ass spoke up, "But before, you were saying whereever we gathered in twos or threes, you would be there too - and now you are saying you're only going to speak through one dude in a funny hat? And he's supposed to dress up all wild? What happened to simplicity and meekness - remember the thing you said about the sparrows and, what was it ... lilies ..."

Jesus glanced around the room, drumming His fingers to indicate His displeasure. "Any other wiseacres care to take a crack at me? Whether salvation is earned through grace alone or if you have to do good works, hmm? Oh, that would be rich, you'd all have a good laugh over that one. Anyone?"

Some of them muttered, "No, my Lord", as they returned to their business, while Peter pondered his funny and extravagant attire.

Pope John Paul the Second Pope John the twenty third Pope Paul the Sixth
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